How a Few Simple Words Can Change Everything

When my son was in elementary school, he endured ongoing verbal bullying. While it wasn’t physical, the impact was profound. Words have a way of settling quietly into a child’s identity, and over time, I could see how those daily comments were shaping his confidence and sense of self. Because he was a bigger kid, the situation was not always taken as seriously as it should have been, yet emotionally, the effects were very real.

During that season, I introduced him to daily affirmations. Each morning, we intentionally spoke words of confidence, strength, and worth, simple phrases designed to remind him who he was before the world tried to define him. I asked him to come up with his own. Slowly, I watched him begin to stand a little taller, his confidence grew, and the strong, kind-hearted boy I once knew began to shine again. 

When he transitioned to a new school with an entirely new group of peers, he carried that affirmation practice with him. At first, everything went well. He adjusted, behaved positively, and seemed grounded. Then, unexpectedly, I received a call from the principal regarding behavioral changes. As I reflected, one key detail stood out: our family schedule had shifted, and his morning affirmations had quietly fallen away.

Once we reestablished that daily practice, the change was unmistakable. The concerning behaviors stopped, the calls from the principal ended, and my son regained his emotional footing. It became clear that affirmations were not just positive words; they were a powerful tool shaping how he regulated his emotions, navigated challenges, and showed up in his environment.

This experience gave me firsthand evidence of what intentional, consistent self-talk can do. Affirmations helped my son reclaim his confidence, start his day with purpose, and respond to the world from a place of strength rather than fear and self-doubt.

Another occasion that I have experienced, the power of words happened several years ago, when I worked at a private Christian school as the outreach coordinator. My role placed me at the front doors each morning, greeting students and parents, and starting the day with warmth and connection. It was during that season that I learned firsthand just how powerful words can be.

There was one mother I began to see regularly whose daughter was struggling with challenging behaviors. Mornings were a struggle for the child, the mother, and her teacher. I watched as this loving mom tried everything she knew, giving instructions, setting expectations, and listing what needed to be done before class. But nothing seemed to stick. The more directives she gave, the more resistance she saw.

One morning, she stopped and said something that stood out to me. She had mentioned how frustrating and sad she was because she knows that her daughter is a sweet girl, but she is struggling in the mornings when getting to class. I explained how frustrating it must be for everyone, especially her daughter. Her daughter had not really been around other children because her older sister was a teenager, and it was her first time in the classroom. 

We talked more, and I shared my experience with my son and explained the change I saw in my son when we added affirmations to his daily morning routine.  I offered that simple idea, which felt almost too small to make a difference.

Instead of starting the day with demands, we would start it with affirmations.

Each morning, when her daughter arrived, I greeted her and asked her to speak five positive affirmations over herself. Not things she had to do but truths about who she was. Words that reinforced her identity, her worth, and her ability to make good choices.

Slowly, something remarkable began to happen.

Within about two weeks, the mother came back and shared that her daughter’s behavior had changed dramatically. The outbursts that once felt constant had significantly decreased. The tension at home and at school was easing. She told me, “Most of the challenges she was having are gone.”

What changed wasn’t just behavior; it was belief.

Encouraged by what I was seeing, I took the same practice and introduced it to a much larger group. Every Wednesday, during chapel with roughly 80 students, we started the Affirmation Challenge. Together, the children spoke positive, life-giving words over themselves.

Before long, teachers began sharing something unexpected.

They noticed that Wednesdays, chapel days, were often some of the best days of the week. Classrooms felt calmer. Students were more regulated, more confident, and more connected. Several teachers even began using affirmations daily, telling me they could clearly see the difference between days when students spoke affirmations and days when they did not.

Words matter.

I have and will continue to use what I have named "power words" each day with my own children before school and while I am in the pool teaching survival swimming lessons. The power of starting your day or when facing a challenging event with positive words that speak life over you and the situation can and will change your life. I want to encourage you to create and to speak five powerful I statements over yourself for 21 days, and you will experience the power of your words. I want you to think about where you need growth or change in your life and speak positive, life-giving words.

Here are some of mine.

Examples:

1. I am healthy; no cancer cells will ever live in my body.

2. I am a mighty finisher.

3. I am strong.

4. I am kind.

5. I have integrity.

What we speak over ourselves shapes how we see ourselves and how we show up in the world. When children (and adults) are reminded of truth, dignity, and capability, it creates space for growth, self-control, and peace to take root.

Affirmations are not about ignoring challenges. They are about anchoring ourselves and our children, in truth, before the challenges arise.

And sometimes, the smallest shift in language can lead to the biggest transformation. 

If this has touched your heart and you are willing to use your "power words, " I encourage you to do it for the full 21 days. If it touched you on behalf of another, share this with them, ot teach this to a friend or child. Sharing is caring.

I invite you to try a simple exercise with someone.

•  Ask them to count silently in their mind.

• While they are counting, point to them and ask them to say their name out loud. 

• When they do, ask what happened to the counting. 

Almost every time, they’ll say it stopped. 

That pause is worth reflecting on. It shows how spoken words can interrupt and redirect the constant stream of thoughts running through our minds. What we say out loud doesn’t just express what we’re thinking; it replaces it. This is why the words we use about ourselves matter so much. They have the power to quiet negative thought patterns and create space for something healthier to take root.

At a deeper level, this exercise invites us to consider where we’re drawing our sense of identity from. Many of us carry labels shaped by past experiences, expectations, or failures. But when we speak words that are grounded in truth, purpose, and value, we begin to separate ourselves from those limiting narratives. Our spoken words help anchor us to who we truly are, not just what we feel in a moment. So take time for self-reflection. Pay attention to what you’re saying about yourself, both silently and aloud. When your words are intentional and life-giving, they have the ability to shift your mindset and reinforce a stronger, more grounded sense of identity. What you speak has power, often more than you realize.